Rapid Assault

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Submarines and sealabs, ahoy! Packed with all the straight-to-video action and bland mustachioed guys you’ve come to expect from a Fred Olen Ray joint, it’s Rapid Assault! 

A terrorist builds a world-ending biological weapon in an abandoned sealab at the bottom of the ocean - presumably for tax purposes? - and threatens to release it if the U.S. military won’t pay him a relatively low, Rod-from-Birdemic amount of money. So the military does what any reasonable force trying to prevent human extinction would do: they call in one agent. A guy named Decker (no, as far as we know Tim Heidecker had nothing to do with this) with an occasional Southern accent and a penchant for kicking guys slowly.

Can Decker and a dead scientist’s daughter save the world? Will a submarine deploy nuclear weapons for no good reason? Will anyone notice the sealab sets look an awful lot like a factory from any other Fred Olen Ray action film? Join Mike, Kevin and Bill for the Rapid Assault and find out! 

Written by: Mike Nelson, Conor Lastowka, and Sean Thomason

Contributing Writers: Jason Miller and Zach Shatzer

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Poster art by Mattie Lubchansky
Poster art by Mattie Lubchansky

RiffMeter rating

9.38182
Average: 9.4 (55 votes)

Content Rating

TV-14-LV

Profanity
Violence

Genre

Release date

March 25, 2022

Runtime

77 minutes
Captions (Streaming Video)