Irresistible Force

What happens when an irresistible force meets an immovable object? We don’t know, because usually it's an unstoppable force in this scenario. But back in 1993, the Irresistible Force finally got its chance to shine!

Stacy Keach (Icebreaker) is a cop who is mere weeks away from retirement. Despite this, his angry chief demands his badge and gun after a bust goes awry thanks to his new loose cannon partner, Cynthia Rothrock (38% of the RiffTrax catalog). The clichés come fast and furious, like those cars in that movie, Days of Thunder. The only thing stopping Keach from remarking that he’s “Getting too old for this shit” is that this movie originally aired on network TV, and a cuss word might make the movie centering around a terrorist gas attack non-family-friendly. Stacy’s alternate declaration that he's “Getting too old for Mr. Falcon” confused and angered viewers who were already on edge from tuning in, expecting to see a very special episode of Madman of the People.

A new mall is opening in town, and as you’d expect, every man, woman, and foreign dignitary has turned up for the ribbon cutting. This seems ludicrous on its face, but when ripping off the most famous scene of Under Siege* is part of the opening ceremony, you can understand why attendance was high. Soon the entire mall is under the control of terrorists, including Stacy’s son, who is there to shoplift Gameboy games. No hostage situation is too perilous to forego the allure of a free Mole Mania or Gargoyle’s Quest!

The two partners are on their own to stop the terrorists. Fortunately, one of them has played Hamlet and Falstaff and the other one is great at kicking. Does this make their Force Irresistible? On a force scale of Roo-Roo Page to Pong Krell we’d rate it firmly as a Zubain Ankonori.

*Your husband is just pretending to have no idea what scene we’re talking about

Written by: Mike Nelson, Conor Lastowka, Sean Thomason, Jason Miller, and Zachary Shatzer