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RiffTrax by: Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett
A classic short from the public domain!

Aquatic Champions. For years their achievements went largely unnoticed, mainly due to the fact that everyone can quickly come up with a list of dozens of things they would rather do than watch someone swim competitively. Five just sprang to your mind while reading this sentence alone. But in 1948, on a warm summer day in Beverly Hills, the world stood up and took notice for the first annual Parade of Aquatic Champions. The world then quickly realized why they had never thrown one before or ever would again.

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RiffTrax by: Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett
A classic short from the public domain!
Have you ever been on the Disneyland ride, "It's a Small World After All"? Wait, where are you going! Come back! This short isn't about that ride. It contains no references to that ride. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up so abruptly. Here, breathe into this paper bag. Stop muttering to yourself, it'll be alright.
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RiffTrax by: Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett
A classic short from the public domain!

It’s the sunniest Night Before Christmas yet. Not a creature is stirring, not even the stuffed, mummified mouse that’s lovingly stapled to the floor. Sugarplums dance in the heads of children, causing the children to wonder, what’s a sugarplum, and why would it dance so suggestively?

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RiffTrax by: Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett
A classic short from the public domain!
Santa Claus, famous fat Saint, is best known for his advances in forced deer flight and his work as a firm-but-fair elf foreman. But the man is even more gifted than his great big sack (*cough*), as we learn in the supernatural thriller Christmas Dream! Call him Professor X-mas, as his telepathic powers will awe and terrify you. (Did you call him Professor X-mas yet? No? Fine, whatever.)
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RiffTrax by: Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett
A classic short from the public domain!
The story of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer has been told and retold countless times, in film, TV and song. All of those other versions are better than this one. Even the cold war-era East German version "Rudolf van der Schlittenfahrt", which features far more marching and distant machine gun fire than a Christmas special ever should.
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RiffTrax by: Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett
A classic short from the public domain!

George Bailey running down the streets of Bedford Falls. Linus explaining to a hushed audience what Christmas is really about. A desperate Arnold suiting up as Turbo Man for the Christmas parade. In no specific order, these were our top Christmas movie moments. But we think that after watching Christmas Rhapsody, you will agree with us that the scene where the The Forester's family sings an off-key version of "Silent Night" to their Christmas Tree has to
belong in our top three. 

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CallItFreePoster1.jpg

For anyone who has ever dreamed of quitting their job and going to work as a mechanic at a 1950s service station, Call It Free is the next best thing! Many of us don't have the guts to strap on a grease-stained jumpsuit with our name embroidered on it, and even more of us get hung up on the difficulty of time-traveling back to the 50s, but that doesn't stop us from wistfully stealing a glance in our rearview mirror as we pull out of the gas station and thinking "Exactly what language was that clerk speaking?"

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ThriftPoster1.jpg

American Thrift is a touching tribute to the “Woman American”, brought to you by Chevrolet. Just who is the Woman American you ask? Why, she is the one that those who sell and manufacture what is sold know is the one who decides what we come to buy of what is sold and manufactured. From budgeting the purchase of puppy dogs, packs of pens, and canned eel at the local Food Giant, to planning trips to Nassau, the Woman American is the solid rock on which the home is built.

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CircusWakesPoster.jpg
RiffTrax by: Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy & Bill Corbett
A classic short from the public domain!

Contrary to what many of you are thinking, A Circus Wakes Up is NOT a wrenching adaptation of a short story by Philip Roth that recounts the heartbreaking tale of Bernard Circus, a Classics professor at Columbia, who is forced to confront his shattered marriage, his failure as a father, and a decidedly lackluster academic career.

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WomenInBluePoster.jpg
Women in Blue tells the tale of one of baseball's most storied franchises, the Los Angeles Dodgers. Actually, that's not true. We just have an Oakland A's fan on our staff who remains incredibly bitter about the 1988 World Series. In retrospect, it was a poor decision to let him write this description's opening sentence.
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