Catalog » Short

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Kevin is the new kid in class, and he’s got typical teenage problems. His mom obsessively hoards coffee pots and his dad has an insane inability to live without garlic salt. Oh, and he’s haunted by the ghost of a fellow student who died horribly in a bus accident last year. Rather than...
Average: 4.5 (40 votes)
Mar 5 2013
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Ten Long Minutes is the harrowing tale of one young man’s attempt to download a grainy .jpg of Alyssa Milano via CompuServe in 1996 before his parents -- wait, sorry, wrong story...just forget you ever read that. Ten Long Minutes starts off like a classic grisly safety short...
Average: 4.4 (45 votes)
Feb 28 2013
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Our short Safety With Animals features more hilarious child endangerment than the inevitable FOX series Celebrity Child Boxing! The short teaches kids important skills, like, which wild snakes you should pick up - they claim the answer isn’t “none of them.” In...
Average: 4.7 (40 votes)
Feb 12 2013
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Live and Learn has an important safety message for kids, namely “Hey kids, here’s a bunch of ideas for cool stuff that would be super fun to do! Now don’t do any of the stuff, and how dare you even think about it, and certainly don’t consider litigation against the...
Average: 4.7 (30 votes)
Feb 5 2013
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A short in the classic 1950s tradition of “let’s talk about a thing that’s terrible without REALLY talking about a thing that’s terrible,” Say No To Strangers presents a world that’s mostly sunshine, friendly policemen, and hopscotch...but also the...
Average: 4.5 (34 votes)
Jan 29 2013
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Another vintage 70s short in the “stuff your parents should really have already taught you at home” series (see The Calendar: How to Use It for further knowledge), Tic Toc Time Clock makes learning about time fun! Well, not so much “fun” as garish, frantic...
Average: 4.1 (37 votes)
Dec 11 2012
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Choking: To Save a Life is merely one chapter in the wildly popular Choking series. It came hot on the heels of the legendary Choking: To Get Out of A ‘Couples’ Baby Shower and the controversial Choking: Your Tax Guy To Get Him To Approve Your Super Bowl Tickets As A Write Off...
Average: 4.6 (31 votes)
Dec 7 2012
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Despite the title, our new short is NOT about popping Percocets, though there’s a good chance the people who filmed it were doing just that. Perc! Pop! Sprinkle! Such a mysterious title. What does it mean? Does it mean anything? It probably doesn’t mean anything, right? Who...
Average: 4.4 (39 votes)
Nov 29 2012
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Get That Job is an instructional film that teaches adults all the secret tips for landing a high paying job. First and foremost, if a potential employer asks if you actually needed to watch a film called Get That Job in order to learn how to get a job, strongly deny having ever...
Average: 4.6 (40 votes)
Nov 28 2012
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You are of course familiar with the story of The Hare & The Tortoise. It is part of the grand tradition of children’s fables such as The Grapes & The Fox, The Cash & The Tango, and The Being Written Backwards and The Why Are These Things...
Average: 4.3 (19 votes)
Oct 30 2012
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Love That Car! is a short about automobile safety narrated in the style of the “nnnnnYEEES?” clerk guy you’ll recognize from the Flintstones and the Simpsons. That sentence should really be all the convincing anyone needs to check this out immediately. Young women, Boy...
Average: 4.4 (50 votes)
Jul 17 2012
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Our new short Joy Ride feels like beloved movie Dazed and Confused, but shortened dramatically, focusing on the minor characters, with less emphasis on keg parties up at the Moontower and more on the tragic consequences of reckless behavior. In short, it’s the perfect film!When...
Average: 4.4 (36 votes)
Jul 6 2012
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Like Tarzan of the Jungle and Nanook of the North before him, Jimmy of the Safety Patrol heroically swings from vines of proper bus etiquette and drives a sled of huskies that look both ways at pedestrian crosswalks (we’re not exactly sure what Nanook of the North did, we’ve...
Average: 4.5 (42 votes)
Jun 30 2012
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When you look back at your formative education years, there are a few flashbulb memories when even as a young child, you realized that the educational system was truly doing its job. The first time you could recite your multiplication tables. The day you learned how to spell Mississippi. And of...
Average: 4.3 (20 votes)
Jun 15 2012
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Dinosaurs! They were fearsome! They were hulking! They were evidently quite poorly drawn! Yes, dinosaurs once ruled the earth, and if you need any information about them, you are welcome to consult the hundreds, if not tens of thousands of movies, tv shows and books on the subject. Should any of...
Average: 4.2 (38 votes)
May 3 2012
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Not to be confused with the equally-pathetic Superman villain Toyman, The Toymaker is a strange Scandinavian man who makes toys for all the children in his village. Well, presumably. He doesn’t actually make any toys in this short, and there’s no village, but he DOES pit two of...
Average: 4.4 (42 votes)
Apr 25 2012
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Nutrition: The All-American Meal exists primarily as a guide to the wide and varied world of 70s hideousness. Throughout, a seemingly endless parade of unfortunate choices marches in front of the camera to lecture us about the “All-American Meal” of a hamburger, fries and a...
Average: 4.5 (54 votes)
Apr 24 2012
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The Fish That Nearly Drowned is about a fish who [SPOILER ALERT] nearly drowns. Whoops, guess that spoiler alert should have come a bit earlier. Forget you saw it! The titular fish in question might actually drown! Because that is something that a fish can evidently do! But even...
Average: 4.3 (34 votes)
Apr 10 2012
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Danger Keep Out! is not just the sign any Taco Bell that carries the new taco whose shell is made of a giant Dorito is legally required to display. It’s also the name of one of the finest Canadian safety epics ever produced. One day, Christine decides to explore the construction site...
Average: 4.6 (72 votes)
Mar 13 2012
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We know what you’re probably thinking. “Cooks AND chefs in a single film?? Sure, you might be able to pull it off if we were talking one or the other. Just cooks, or just chefs. And that’s still a big ‘might.’ But to bring both together in one short? WHEN DID...
Average: 4.5 (52 votes)
Mar 8 2012
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Drinking problems! In real life? Devastating addictions that can ruin careers and tear marriages apart. Clumsily depicted onscreen in 70s educational shorts? Hilarious! Chuck is the oily star of Alcohol. Like Don Draper, he just needs a shot or two to take the edge off and close the deal....
Average: 4.1 (53 votes)
Mar 1 2012
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Why would you want to go outside and sail a toy boat when you could sit in a classroom and watch a film about other kids sailing a toy boat? The existence of Sailing a Toy Boat asserts that you wouldn’t, of course, you dolt. This short must have inspired lots of discussion questions...
Average: 4.4 (28 votes)
Feb 28 2012
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Sometimes, we find something special. Something so strange, so distinct, and so wonderfully sad that by the time it ends we’re curled on the floor, guts cramped from laughing, clutching clumps of our own freshly-pulled hair as the keepers come to usher us back into our comfortable pens. ...
Average: 4.6 (85 votes)
Feb 16 2012
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The Clean Club was created to teach kids about basic hygiene and washing habits, and it’s our dear hope that it will find new life as an instructional film shown at Comic-Con registration. It’s a horrific tale of children who have reached such hobo-in-a-ditch levels of filth...
Average: 4.5 (65 votes)
Feb 2 2012
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Running a Lemonade Stand is a childhood rite of passage, much like going off the high dive or finding a bloated corpse floating in the swimming pool right after you went off the high dive. Whipping up a bunch of artificially lemon flavored substance and selling it to neighborhood adults who would...
Average: 4.1 (37 votes)
Jan 31 2012
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