Sequels, prequels, remakes, and re-imaginings...for years, it seemed Hollywood had run out of ideas. But then came the Underworld series, with the most original concept yet: Vampires and werewolves fighting each other! And it only took a solitary sequel before the makers realized, "Hey! Let's make movies that happened BEFORE the first one! It worked for Lucas, right?"
Yes, for those who simply CAN'T WAIT for the new Twilight movies, this will wet your appetite for blandness and crappy vampire on werewolf action. And yes we do imply both meanings to that sentence...let's just say, you'll never look at cliffs the same way again. But hey, at least nobody sparkles.
The One Man Band (no stranger to lame werewolf movies) and Moleman (no stranger to violent, cinematic overindulgence) unite to not only drive the final stake into the coffin of this blue-tinted snorefest, but to make sure the only "Rise" you'll get from this movie is a few chuckles. Well, and maybe bile...we're humorists, not miracle workers.
Be prepared to witness this action pa--no, wait...this horror/thrill...no...this well-acted dram...uh...hmm...well uh, this...OK, we're not sure WHAT it is. But remember this: In the Underworld, there is no depth we can't sink to.
NOTE: The sample contains slightly naughty language. The riff isn't as naughty as the movie, but use caution in your workplace and/or elementary school.
Comments
I'd like to thank my partner The One Man Band (SethPaul) for agreeing to this crazy idea of recording a two person riff while remaining on opposite sides of the country. Through the magic of the Internet and an endless amount of e-mail trading, our 2+ month project finally came to fruition. This has definitely been the most fun riff I've worked on and if this thing has a fair amount of success, expect more from us in the future.
Yes, now our PALs (har har, har dee har har) in countries that prefer a faster way to watch movies can now enjoy all the splendor (or is it splendour?) of this film and its tomfoolery.
Unfortunately, our translations into Mandarin, Swahili, and Dutch will all have to be put on hold indefinitely, since we don't know those languages. Also, our SECAM edition has been cancelled, as that would just be silly.
The riff was very good. There were very many funny lines, but the movie choice wasn't quite the best. It was a bad movie, but it wasn't bad enough to be Grade-A riff material. That being said, they did an excellent job with what they had. I look forward to their next iRiff.
A good balance of observations, random references and comments directly on point.
This is one of those movies that gets worse each time you watch it, which makes the iriff vital to own.
Recommended