Ice on Mars

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Ice on Mars vs. The Day of the Triffids

 

Long before M. Night Shyamalan's "The Happening," though ... slightly later than "Little Shop of Horrors," there were some really dull, shambling plants that attacked people in a little film called "The Day of the Triffids"! It's British, so...

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Ice on Mars - Pack of Briefs volume 2

If Hollywood has taught us anything, it's that people love sequels. That's why we've gone back to a project over a year old that never really sold like hotcakes to begin with. BECAUSE IT'S KIND OF A SEQUEL. Join Michael T Bradley and Scix Maddix as they tackle the following...

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Ice on Mars vs. The Karate Kid

Once every century (so far, and only counting the last century and the current one, but definitely every century since film was invented) there comes a movie about an older Asian man teaching a young American kid the ancient secrets of karate so that he won't get his ass kicked on a daily...

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Star Trek: Voyager: Learning Curve

You WILL NOT BELIEVE the pulse-pounding, edge-of-your-seat excitement that is the end of season one of Star Trek: Voyager! Having amazingly made it home through strife and turmoil, the crew of the Voyager finds their home quadrant IN RUINS!!! The Federation in SHAMBLES!!! Desperately...

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Star Trek: Voyager: Faces

[TANGERINE DREAM-ISH "MEANINGFUL" SCI-FI MUSIC]

Imagine your entire society was plagued by a horrific disease that caused insanity-inducing pain and eventual breakdown of beauty to the point of grotesquerie. You are a biologist in said race, no longer racing against time but...

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Star Trek: Voyager: Emanations

Heaven. The afterlife. Whether myth or reality, there's no denying that the promise of life after death is what keeps many people sane in a world of hardship, sorrow and cruelty. Also it's a really awesome song by Warrant. I saw them live back in '93. That was amazing. Jani Lane climbed like...

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Ice on Mars: Twilight: New Moon

Much like how in The Godfather the word "Mafia" is never actually spoken, in the Twilight saga's New Moon, neither the words "furry" nor "bestiality" are ever said by any character, BUT it is what the entire premise of the film is about....

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Ice on Mars - The Lizzie McGuire Movie

In this, Ice on Mars' much anticipated* second movie release after TWILIGHT, we continue our trend of tackling tween tales of truly terrifying tackiness. This time, though (shush, T!) we even went further down the age scale and went for the Hilary Duff vehicle THE LIZZIE McGUIRE MOVIE. Even if...

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Star Trek Voyager: Ex Post Facto

In this, the ... seventh or eighth episode of Voyager (is the pilot a two-parter or one double-sized episode? The debate rages on), after dealing with banjos, time paradoxes, time paradoxes, organ theft, an angry cloud and a wormhole that gets them all home, you'd think Voyager wouldn't have...

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Ice on Mars - Star Trek: The Next Generation: Best of Both...

OH NOES! Jean-Luc Picard is a Borg! Whatever shall we do? Well, a few months later we're gonna start off the new season with some slam-bang action, THAT'S what we're gonna do! If we're the people making ST:TNG. But we're not. We're people viewing it 15 years later and mocking it, so WE are going...

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Michael appears as guest riffer!

Hey, kid gang! If you like our stuff, then I'm guessing you'll get a kick out of Meat: From Range To Market, a short from Aaron Bossig that features none other than Ice on Mars' Michael T Bradley! Go buy it & support it! I'm almost certain you'll dig it if you dig our stuff, but check out...

Ice on Mars: Pack of Briefs Volume 1

Oh, the past, when anyone would make a film about anything, it seems. "Girls Beware" is a short, dreary film about how men are nothing but rape-a-saurs, and "Mother Takes a Holiday part 1" is the first half of a bizarre tale concerning how the new Whirlpools are a triumph for...

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Ice on Mars - Twilight

If you think back, I'm sure we all can remember a time that we were an innocent, naive 13-year-old girl who wanted nothing more than for the cute older boy in our class to look our way and realize how special we were beneath our clumsy exterior. For most of us, the story ended with us realizing...

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Lost City Chapter 6: Human Beasts

Well, here we are, everybody, at the halfway point of this monstrous beast. Ice on Mars is proud to present the first two-riffer entry into this fun little nugget of film history. Look, if you're on this page, you probably know what you're getting yourself in for, so there's not much to say. If...

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Star Trek Voyager: Time and Again

Hey, kids, we're back! And in an episode totally unlike the last episode, in which Voyager caused itself to be stuck in a black hole, this time around (for the THIRD episode!) Voyager causes itself to cause a world to go apocalyptic, leaving behind rifts that take...

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Star Trek Voyager: Parallax

Once more unto the breach, dear friends ....

 

In Parallax, Voyager encounters a black hole. Also, Belanna is bickered over as the head of engineering, and Janeway finally gives in because they have an idea at the same times. This means she's obviously better...

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Star Trek Voyager: Caretaker

Like so much Trek, Voyager's high concept is brilliant, but its execution is, shall we say, somewhat flawed. Ostensibly about a solitary Federation ship in uncharted territory having to mix with a renegade Maquis crew, searching for a way home and having to adapt and take drastic...

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