The Forger by Chickriffs

$0.99

The Forger is currently available to U.S. users of Netflix Instant and also for free on Youtube. Just search The Forger. (You'll have to deal with some subtitles in an unknown Arabic language on Youtube, but if anything that makes it more interesting.)

If you're interested in actually owning this thing, it is offered for rent and digital buy at Amazon.com. And also maybe the $5 DVD bin at the Walmart in Carmel, CA.

Hallmark Hall of Fame prese—What? This movie isn’t even good enough for Hallmark? Wow. Anyway... The Forger tells the story of a teenage homeless boy named Josh who’s abandoned by his druggy mom in a small upscale art town. What do you think the sad little homeless boy would do?

a)      Get a job.

b)      Call the police.

c)       Finish other people’s paintings, stalk pretty girls, punch the girl’s brother for no reason, and break into a house to finish yet another painting, later falling asleep in the house.

If you answered C. then you are absolutely right! You win a NEW CAR!!! (Just kidding.) But the man who’s house he broke into wants to adopt him! See, this man is an art forgery dealer so this kid’s convenient, extremely specific, and somehow overly-utilized talent for imitating other people's artwork is very useful to him. He bribes the kid to recreate a destroyed masterpiece, which they fortunately have an incredibly detailed photo of. Their endeavor is of course, illegal, so who stands in their way? An overbearing social worker and a sweet old lady. You can cut the tension with a butter knife! 

There are several reason why the producers thought this would be a good movie:

1.       Lauren Bacall! You know who she is right? She's totally hot! At least, she was in the 40's.

2.        Alfred Molina! He was in beloved movies like The Da Vinci Code and The Sorcerer's Apprentice! And he was Octavius in Spider-Man 2!

3.       Hadyen Panateeire—???? as the beautiful blonde who is absolutely fine with being totally stalked by a homeless loser! She's in Nashville and Heroes! And she was on the cover of SOUTHERN LIVING! LOVE HER!

4.       And finally the incomparable JOSH HUTCHERSON, doing his trademark good-guy shtick...when he's playing an edgy homeless guy. He stars in the worldwide blockbuster Hunger Games! We only released this movie because he's in it! We delayed it two years just to ride on his thunder, just like instant classics like the new Red Dawn and Journey 2: The Mysterious Green Screen! This movie has to be good!”

Yeah. It’s not good. But that’s why you’re here. And that’s why I want you to buy my commentary, because it makes this already horribly funny movie, more funny. Thank you guys!

Madison of Chick Riffs

Note for those streaming the movie on the internet with the riff: I find that sometimes the riff tracks get out of sync if a) the computer is performing another task or b) the actual stream is lagging. A good internet connection will be key in enjoy this riff using stream. 

iRiff file formats

WAV (957.33 MB)