RiffMeter (64 votes)
Ah, beer. Balm of hurt minds, great nature's second course, chief nourisher in life's feast! (We think that's what the Swan of Avon was referring to...) Beer provides everything the human body needs—if anything, what little it lacks can be made up with regular doses of loaded potato skins, an occasional pickled egg, or several handfuls of pub mix (if you can get it before the loud guy with Pat Riley hair picks out all the peanuts.) Yes, beer is perfect and holy, but lately it has been maligned by dark forces. Envious, beady-eyed, sober little creatures who resent that the rest of us have a way to actually have fun playing softball, or going bowling. That we have a beverage that makes encounters with our family almost bearable, enhances our powers of seduction and gives us the courage to jump over a too-high park bench when goaded on by our fun-loving friend. (The fact that we didn't make it and shattered four of our teeth in the process is immaterial to the argument.)
Thank goodness As We Like It puts these horrible little busybodies in their place using sound reasoning, gentle persuasion and a few tall frosty ones. Mike, Kevin and Bill belly up and tap into As We Like It.